Seems like forever ago when I remember being young and feeling like I could take on the world. I didn't pay attention to my size, and scraps and bruises seemed like nothing. If someone told me there was no way I could do something because of my size, I would find a way to prove them wrong.
I regret that now. Before I get to far, I guess I should go into the whole "my size" explanation. I'm 5'1" and my weight fluctuates anywhere from 99 lbs to 110 lbs. The most I've ever weighed in my life was when I was pregnant with my 1st child, and I topped the scales at 170 lbs. Due to my fast metabolism and hyperglycemia, I lost that weight in 4 months. I've heard all the skinny jokes, and anorexia jokes. It is rather entertaining when people see me eat and then question where I put it.
I injured my shoulder working as a janitor, pushing a 1000 lb gross weight floor scrubber with the fresh water tank filled up and bad bearings in the wheels. I'd been telling the company for quite some time that it needed fixed, so they finally did a short cut fix by greasing the bad bearings. It didn't do any good. That happened back in 2014, and since then I've tried finding ways to do the things I used to do without hurting. The specialist told me that surgery for a secondary issue could prevent possible further damage, but, would more then likely cause the primary problem to get worse. Meaning, my shoulder would be 95% useless. It already feels useless most days, but I manage. I've re-taught myself how to use a sewing machine left handed, I can use a small caliber riffle left handed (south paw), and various other things.
But, because I've always been right side dominant, I created another problem for myself by pushing myself to try and do what I used to be able to do with both shoulders. Mind you, I've always been a person to exercise. I'd been keeping up on my lower body workout, and doing very basic on the upper body. I felt that if I could at least keep myself in good physical condition on the lower extremities, I'd be okay.
I was wrong, again. I now have a slight twist in my spine, degenerative disk disease, a flattened nerve on my L5 disk, and I find out in a couple weeks if my hip is also to blame. Some days I can barely walk let alone get dressed it hurts so bad. But, I keep chugging along. I still work, do my best to keep my house clean, and a garden in the summer.
My children, family, and friends have been my biggest blessing through all of this. I didn't ever use to ask for help, at all. I felt week if I had to ask for help. But, I have learned that because of my stubborness and pride I made myself week. I still have a strong spirit, but I also have the courage to ask for help doing the things I can no longer do on my own.
So, if you are reading this and you are still young without a care in the world, be sure and take care of yourself. I'm only 34 and I regret not listening to advice I was given when I was barely 20.
Until next time,
Stay Strange
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