Single in a Small Town

First off, let me just start by saying that I'm perfectly content being a single mom. I've had my ups and downs with it, but I have an amazing network that helps out with a LOT. In all honesty I wouldn't have it any other way, mostly because I've had some crap relationships, and I'm just enjoying life with my kids with no toilet seat left up (unless my boys forget), or a mass of hair in the sink or shower.

Okay, so now you're probably wondering what the title is leading on to, or, maybe not but whatever. Any single lady, especially ones that are deemed or considered *Cute* in a small town, will understand this next part completely. As mentioned above I'm a single mom, which means on occasion I get to go to the grocery store, alone. Birds singing, crowd cheering, and precious kitten meows of pure blissful time in a store without 3 kids all talking to you at once, grocery store time, alone. The ability to get in, get what I need, and get out without being asked 30 times for a box of sugar coated garbage. You get the idea.

I've found, once or twice, that I apparently don't always have that frazzled, works to much mom appearance about me. I found this out by being approached by a guy that had been chasing me through the store, just to ask me if I was single. I hadn't realized he was chasing me through the store until I realized he had just turned down every isle I was leaving. When my kids aren't with me, I speed shop. Anyways, dumbfounded me, could only say, "uhhhhh, yes." His response was, "Really, wow!" "Hey, I've gotta job!" "Can I take you out to dinner sometime?"

At that point, my brain quit sending the right words to my mouth and I said something about not even knowing him and wow! That's kinda random! He then asked me if he could give me his number so I could call him. Dumbfounded me said "okay, sure." The entire time this guy was talking to me, I was thinking, "Did the bars dry up?" Afterwards, the rest of my shopping trip was hurried along even quicker with my acquired acknowledgements of him smiling at me every time I happened to appear in his sight. Occasionally I'd give one of my "that's nice" smiles back. 

After that nightmare was over, I posted the just of what happened to Facebook, and my friends and I had a good laugh. I also don't go to the store very often without my children in tow anymore either. 

Hope you got a little laugh, and if you can relate or have had a similar instance, feel free to share.

Until next time,

Stay Strange

Hip Surgery

The time has finally arrived, and after 2 years of fighting with the Dr, I finally get one of my physical problems fixed.

Back in my post of Chronic Pain, which gave a brief run down on how I got to this point, I told you all about my lower back and how it might possibly be mostly to blame on my hip. Come to find out, I have a tear in my labrum, (the specialist described it like a plunger that holds my femur in place), and because of that it was causing most of my pain when bending over, squatting down etc.

The first course of action though, was to get a cortisone injection in my hip. You have no idea how difficult it can be to agree to let someone stick a huge needle in your hip, when you are terrified of needles. For those of you that understand that agonizing fear and are facing an injection, stay strong. The day after the injection, and it had to be the day after because what they gave me to calm my nerves knocked me out for the rest of the day, I was able to bend over, put on my pants like a normal person, and shovel and push my work van out of the snow. I haven't been that happy since I got my license to drive. I was literally dancing all over for a couple days, and then cleaned my house from top to bottom even with my bad shoulder.

That was done before Christmas in Dec 2017. Now, I'm sitting at home recovering from my surgery, and it's March 2nd, 2018. I'm on day 4 of recovery, and feeling extremely hopeful. The surgery itself went pretty good. They only needed one anchor to reattach my labrum to my femur, and ground off a little of my femur that was rubbing and causing fraying to my labrum. It was a little embarrassing getting prepared for the surgery. They had my wipe my body down in sections with warmed chlorine towelettes, standing completely naked behind a curtain, not fully awake because I didn't get my cup of morning coffee (which is the first thing I asked for upon waking up from surgery) and all the while wondering if I was supposed to use the wipe for section three on my girly goodies and ass, or, just the surrounding area. I opted against asking the nurse that question through the curtain, and opted against using a chlorine wipe there. 

The only downside's so far have been, the medication that they gave me and are having me take, and the fact that I'm on crutches. I'm already accustomed to taking pain medication throughout the day, but, taking more then what I'm used to got me pretty backed up. After getting myself cleaned out with some extra strong coffee, prunes, and molasses I'm feeling better, but, most certainly not wanting to take as much pain medication as they suggested. Especially since they've got me taking aspirin and suggesting ibuprofen as well. It's almost like my meals are consisting of pills these last few days.

I have been looking into other alternatives for natural pain relief for a while now, mostly because I'm tired of relying on a pill just to make it through the day. I finally decided to order some CBD oil through a company, that lets you sign up for free and offers a 60 day money back guarantee. Now, I'm trying to patiently wait for it to arrive so I can see for myself if it does in fact work on pain, muscle spasms, and helps with better sleep. I'll be sure and do a follow up blog post after I try it out and let you all know what I find. If you'd rather research it yourself, click on this link.

Until next time,

Stay Strange

My Chronic Pain

Seems like forever ago when I remember being young and feeling like I could take on the world. I didn't pay attention to my size, and scraps and bruises seemed like nothing. If someone told me there was no way I could do something because of my size, I would find a way to prove them wrong.

I regret that now. Before I get to far, I guess I should go into the whole "my size" explanation. I'm 5'1" and my weight fluctuates anywhere from 99 lbs to 110 lbs. The most I've ever weighed in my life was when I was pregnant with my 1st child, and I topped the scales at 170 lbs. Due to my fast metabolism and hyperglycemia, I lost that weight in 4 months. I've heard all the skinny jokes, and anorexia jokes. It is rather entertaining when people see me eat and then question where I put it.

I injured my shoulder working as a janitor, pushing a 1000 lb gross weight floor scrubber with the fresh water tank filled up and bad bearings in the wheels. I'd been telling the company for quite some time that it needed fixed, so they finally did a short cut fix by greasing the bad bearings. It didn't do any good. That happened back in 2014, and since then I've tried finding ways to do the things I used to do without hurting. The specialist told me that surgery for a secondary issue could prevent possible further damage, but, would more then likely cause the primary problem to get worse. Meaning, my shoulder would be 95% useless. It already feels useless most days, but I manage. I've re-taught myself how to use a sewing machine left handed, I can use a small caliber riffle left handed (south paw), and various other things.

But, because I've always been right side dominant, I created another problem for myself by pushing myself to try and do what I used to be able to do with both shoulders. Mind you, I've always been a person to exercise. I'd been keeping up on my lower body workout, and doing very basic on the upper body. I felt that if I could at least keep myself in good physical condition on the lower extremities, I'd be okay.

I was wrong, again. I now have a slight twist in my spine, degenerative disk disease, a flattened nerve on my L5 disk, and I find out in a couple weeks if my hip is also to blame. Some days I can barely walk let alone get dressed it hurts so bad. But, I keep chugging along. I still work, do my best to keep my house clean, and a garden in the summer.

My children, family, and friends have been my biggest blessing through all of this. I didn't ever use to ask for help, at all. I felt week if I had to ask for help. But, I have learned that because of my stubborness and pride I made myself week. I still have a strong spirit, but I also have the courage to ask for help doing the things I can no longer do on my own.

So, if you are reading this and you are still young without a care in the world, be sure and take care of yourself. I'm only 34 and I regret not listening to advice I was given when I was barely 20.

Until next time,

Stay Strange

Grandpa

Today is a sad day for me. Today is the day that we lay my Grandpa to rest. 

My grandfather was more than just a grandpa to me, he was also a father. When I was young, still a baby, my parents lived with them. I have so many fond memories of running through the kitchen right under the table and not hitting my head. There was also the time that I took the hose to my parents and my grandpa just laughed and laughed because I got them back.

It wasn't until my parents started going through a divorce that my grandpa really stepped in. I remember going down to their house for visits and sitting on grandpas lap and telling him everything. He was the only person I ever really confided in as a child. 

After the divorce, my sister and I lived with my grandparents with my dad. My dad was always working, so my grandparents were the ones I spent time with. My grandpa would take me fishing, hunting, and for drives in the woods. I have fond memories of him and his buddy Bill out on the lake with me in the middle of the boat listening to them talk about the old days, and kicking jokes back and forth, far over my head jokes but I'd laugh right along with them.

He'd take me for rides on his old lawn tractor, which my oldest son now has. I remember steering that old thing and he'd have to help me so we didn't crash. God I loved that. Come apple season he'd always pull out his pocket knife, that hadn't ever been washed I don't think, wipe it on his pants, and cut and core an apple for me right from the tree, whistling as he did. Then he'd wipe it on his pants and put it away. One time he did that right after he sharpened it, and the oil was just a little to much on the apple but I ate it anyways lol.

My grandpa taught me how to sharpen my own knife, and I'm darn good at it thanks to him. I'm surprised he let me go around with a knife at all considering all the trouble I would get myself into. I always knew when I had gone to far because grandpa would come running out the door hollering at me to leave that the hell alone. There were times he would catch me getting into something and lecture me about why I shouldn't mess with that, and what could happen. I use the same tactic with my children. Granted I don't go running out the door hollering so the whole town can hear that my kids just opened up a brand new thing of wood putty and used it to make their mud pies (that was me when I was a kid actually, thank God they haven't done that yet) and then was trying to feed said mud pies to the dog. Thinking back from then to now, my kids are way better then I was!

After I got older, my grandpa would look at me and tell me he always considered me one of his kids, more then just a grand daughter, then he'd chuckle and say well, you are a pretty grand daughter. That was before he started forgetting what my name was. Towards the end I would remind him who I was by starting to sing the swinging song he made up while pushing me on the swing. He would chime right in and for the rest of the day he'd remember my name. I admit, I didn't go see him all that much towards the end. It was so heartbreaking to see him struggle to remember something, or to breath.

I'm thankful for all the memories I have of him. I'm thankful for everything he taught me, and how he taught me because it has come in so handy for my children so I can "learn ya" to them ha ha. I'm also extremely thankful that my grandpa was able to be my dad when I needed one, just as my dad is now doing for my babies.

My grandpa had cronic pulimonary lung disease, and emphysema. He fought long and hard, and finally died peacefully next to the woman he married over 60 years ago on Dec. 15th. I will always remember him and his fun loving ways about life, especially when someone tells me I'm a smartass, cause it's better then being a dumb bunny ;)

Until next time strange ones,

Nancy

P.S. I didn't bother to proof read this. I just wrote it to get it off my mind, and posted. 

What is Normal?

I often ask myself this question, especially when I'm having my off the wall random moments. Has there ever really been a classified case of "Normal" anything? Especially considering science is constantly proving everything wrong!

I know there are a lot of days that I personally don't feel normal. For instance; waking up late, rushing the kids to school just so I can make it back in time to hurry and get ready for work, slide in the door at work just in time to start the day only to realize in my hurry I forgot one thing or another (usually my hair) and then spend the rest of my day wondering what else I forgot while in a complete frazzled mess.

Then, there are days I wake up on time. Leisurely I take my time getting my kids and myself ready, get to work early, one thing leads to another and then, BAM! Day, gone to crap. 

My life has been anything but normal it seems, the same goes for my personality. Most all of my friends consider me weird, which I don't mind. It means I'm unique. Right? The "You're Weird" comments followed by laughter, usually come after one of my random off the wall moments. Those moments where I'm just talking, then randomly throw in a joke or make a funny face with a little dorky laugh.

Sometimes, when I have a quiet moment (which is rare when you have kids), I'll sit and think of what living a normal life must be like. Or what having a normal personality is like. Then I laugh at myself, or should I say laugh at the idea that I might not be all that normal. I've also thought, maybe I'm the normal one, and everyone else is just off their rocker.

I've even gone as far as searching Google for the answer. So far, everything I've read about what normal is, has made me question the mental state of the entire world. I mean seriously! There are some real hum dingers out there. Like the ones that make you question on whether to run away as fast as you can, or, hope that if you just stand still, don't blink, and keep smiling they might not smell your fear and will eventually wander off. 

Pretty sure I'm not one of those types. I think. So far I haven't had many people run from me that I couldn't catch, and I have short legs for my height.

Of course, I could always just snap back to reality and be thankful for my strangely abnormal life and sense of humor. My family and friends should also be thankful for it as well, as my off the wallness keeps them on their toes and a smile on their face. Well, I take that back. My mom could probably disagree (more then almost always) with my sense of humor. What she doesn't know though is, I laugh more shocking or appalling her, then I do at most jokes :)

Until next time strange ones,

Nancy